Thursday, June 29, 2006

Yesterday was way cool. I was trained on web design and live video feed for our station website. It was really cool and easier than I thought. The page launches tomorrow. Also, I have decided to go into my own business and sell sex toys. Yes, you heard me right. Sex toys for bachelorette parties, bridal showers, etc… These parties are hilarious and funny and I think that I can sell the things and make some extra money. They are called F.U.N parties. I am going to start in August. Sex should be fun. Should be mucho fun and I will help! I already have about 12 women interested in coming to my first party. I will also be able to sell items online so as soon as I get the info, shop away. Everything is completely confidential and private.


Sex is natural, sex is fun..

Sex is best when it’s one on one.


“I want your sex “– George Michael

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Bad weekend with Mrs. Bigglesworth. Oh yeah, that is the new name of our cat. Mrs. Bigglesworth got out through the doggie door this weekend. She whored herself all night long. We tried for hours to get her to come back in. At one point grabbing her and forcibly attaching her to my arm. Causing her to rip the crap out of it and causing mucho pain to my skin as well as my broken heart. She eventually came back in and we removed the doggie doors. Otis and Spooky have to be let out like normal dogs now. So far, it is working out great. It is too hot for them outside anyway. 110 right now. They run outside and pee and run back in anyway. The pavement hurts their tootsies.

Jeff is gone on another “business trip.” He comes back tonight. This time wasn’t too bad. Only two days and the girls got ready pretty quickly.  We miss him though.

Friday, June 23, 2006

Green eyes

The above pictures are of two of my cousins in Thailand. My cousin Kara, (the younger female) went on a tour of many countries with some friends. One of the countries was Thailand, where my father’s cousin, Stanley lives with his wife, Jiraporn. He has lived there for about 30 years or even longer. I am not sure. I am insanely jealous of her. One, that she is in Thailand and two that she gets to see Stanley. Stanley looks remarkably like my father and looking at his picture freaks me out a little.  Isn’t Kara gorgeous? She’s a doctor. “A Doct-TAH? Oh, A Dock – Tah! What a good match she would make.” (In the background is the tune Matchmaker, matchmaker from Fiddler on the Roof.)

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Snow in June in VEGAS!

We are doing a lot of wintery like things for 105 degrees. My brother got Alyssa a "make your own snow" kit for her birthday. Along with a carnivorous plant kit. I have pictures posted of the snowman that the girls made on the left. The Venus fly trap kit will be put together this weekend. I also posted shots of the girls ice skating.

Monday, June 19, 2006

I wasn’t going to get Jeff anything for father’s day because of the beautiful purchased and wrapped nothing he gave to me. That kind of reverse guilt does not work on Jeff because Jeff could care less about gifts for Fathers day, birthdays, Christmas, or anniversaries. He really doesn’t. The complete opposite of me. But we got him a 3 –D Crystal picture of the girls. He has wanted one ever since we got one for my dad when Emma was a baby and Alyssa was about 4.  He really liked it. We also spent the day at Toys R Us so Alyssa could spend her gift certificate my parents got her for her birthday.  She split it with her sister which was cool. Not fifty - fifty but thirty – twenty. We also unpacked several boxes and ate tacos. It was a nice relaxing Sunday.

On that note. Happy Fathers Day to my own big daddy. You are a peach.

The girls started Ice Skating on Saturday. They totally rocked the ice. Emma honestly thought that she would be twirling on the ice on her first day and was slightly disillusioned when she found herself needing the ice skating “walker” to stand up. She did really well and only fell once. She started crying and the teacher wiped her tears. They were really nice ladies that paid a lot more attention to her then the other ice skating school that taught Alyssa 4 years ago. But they must have done something right because  Alyssa kicked ass on the ice!! She was a natural and it was as if there was no lapse in her lessons. They really had a good time and I hope that they want to continue. Of course, pictures wont be on until tomorrow.

Friday, June 16, 2006

So, I think I have a cure for my “boredom.” I have nothing to look forward to at the time being. I am a planner. I plan, I make lists and I thrive on being stressed out. I know it sounds stupid but I have nothing going on right now and everything is too calm. Last week I was fine because we were going to California. So I was planning and stressing about that trip. Having something to do makes me complete. Last year at this time, the girls had ballet, gymnastics, arts and crafts and cooking classes. On Saturday the girls start Ice Skating lessons and that will help a little. I also think that I will start EBay again despite the extra stress it causes me. I also want to plan “date night” with Jeff for at least one time a month. It will be something to look forward to.

The girls are also starting JCC camp next week. JCC is the Jewish Community Center where on Fridays they get their dose of Jewishness. If I may, I will quote my darling Emma after last year’s first day of camp. “Mommy, I ‘m JEWISH” Well, yeah you are. I am bummed that the girls will only get to go for one week due to Alyssa’s school track break being over. Year round school. Gotta love it.  

So that is it. The key to my happiness is lists, lots and lots of lists.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Conversations with my husband

"Did you notice that I did the dishes?"

"Did you notice that I gave birth to two kids?"

" Did you notice that I planted those seeds?"

" Did you notice that your daughter likes to wear her panties backwards so her ass cheeks hang out?"

" Did you notice that i forgot to take zinc before implanting that seed?"


This blog isn't even good anymore.

I feel as though I used to be a lot more complex than I am now. I feel very boring which can be good and comforting but sometimes I need more. When I was in college I thrived on drama. Figuratively and literally. I was a theater major who loved the crap that came with that social group. Who slept with whom, who was gay, who was smoking what, etc…. The most important thing was, what was everyone doing on Friday night and am I invited? I had a huge crush on this guy, Blair. He was about 20 years older than me and a much respected actor in the college theater circuit. (Yes, do the math, I was 21, and he was about 40 and still in the college theater scene.) Anyway, all the “younger” actors wanted to be like him and be respected like him. I just wanted to be a part of his “clique.” I knew that if Blair liked me then the others would too. They would respect me as one of them. I never really found out how Blair thought of me. He never even so much as kissed me. He did teach me a lot about movies and 70’s music. I guess he was my friend since he called me a lot. Anyway, at the time, that was my biggest concern. Now it is whether or not Alyssa gets in the school I want her to go to or if Emma does her “y’s” the right way. I miss the excitement of no responsibility. I love my kids but I miss myself. I am now in a body I do not recognize and I am lost in a routine of wife and mommy. There is such much I want to do. So many plans I have made for myself as far as working out, dieting, knitting, sewing, gardening, decorating. Endless lists that I never complete or even get started. I am so exhausted when I come home from work that the days slip away. I feel guilty for wanting more. I have a beautiful life (knock wood) Fantastic kids and a fabulous husband. I feel guilty for wanting an outlet. But I think I need an extra boost. It used to be knitting until I got bored with the scarves. I never really got into scrap booking and I don’t dare join a health club again because the guilt of not going will just about kill me. Turning tricks is so 1989 and getting tattoos just for fun has been done. Now that the Kabbalah craze seems to be over I may look into that. Far be it to me to do what everyone else is doing.  (Yes Mom, I know, the prairie girl skirt… yawn) What do you think? Collecting unicorns or Disney Memorabilia? Maybe I should get an actor crush and obsess about him. Somebody easily obtainable. Rick Schroeder? Will Wheaton?   

Monday, June 12, 2006

Alyssa is 9 Please put it on your calenders for next year.

So, Alyssa turned 9 on Friday. She is officially a “tween”. We had a FAB-U- LOUS time in California this weekend. My mom arranged for the girls to attend a Birthday breakfast with Minnie and friends where they got to meet all of the characters. It was wonderful. The most we had to wait for a ride was 20 minutes and that was for the Haunted Mansion. It turns out that it was High school senior day and the place was mobbed. Fortunately, not too many of them were in Fantasy Land. On Saturday we went to Universal Studios. That was fun. They had a water park thing and a whole Nickelodeon section. Pictures are up!! Click on left!. Thank you mom for this fabulous trip. Alyssa had the best birthday!!

Wednesday, June 7, 2006

I have posted the latest pictures. Just click on the link on the sidebar on the left. If all of the pictures do not show up just press your refresh button or F5.


Tuesday, June 6, 2006

6-6-6 is for scaredy cats

Busy week for us. Last night my father’s cousin was in town for the Gem and Jewelry show. It is a huge convention that brought in quite a few thousand people. We went to dinner at the Venetian Hotel. Mmm ring a ding ding.  It was packed but we got into the restaurant really quickly. Huge portions of food! Of course I don’t have the pictures yet but they will be on the site starting tomorrow. We went to Elizabeth and Steve’s house for BBQ and swimming on Sunday. It was really nice. They have this really cool kid named Alexander that stole Alyssa’s heart.  He is 1 ½ and have the biggest blue eyes I have ever seen.  On Wednesday we are having a surprise get together at Chuck E Cheeses for Alyssa’s birthday. I am not having a real party for her because we are taking her and Emma to a surprise trip to Disneyland on Thursday night. She doesn’t know any of this.

Friday, June 2, 2006

I speak mew mew.

Call me the cat whisperer. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Miss Annie P. Kitty sat on my lap while I raked her head with my nails which she seemed to enjoy immensely. She then felt comfortable enough to jump on our bed and force my hands to pet her. After that she felt anger towards my toes and proceeded to attack and mutilate.  All night… for hours…..and hours……and hours.

The cat has officially become a Tatum family member.  She is so pretty and crazy. I adore her. Thank you for everyone that gave advice. I think she knows that she is safe with us and she wont have to kitty whore herself on the streets anymore for vittles.